Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

If we were to count from the time we starting researching an adoption agency, we have been working on the adoption for 16 months already and we still don't have our dossier submitted. Initially, I was so optimistic and even thought we would have our precious child by now. In hindsight, my naive optimism makes me laugh. I suppose the average internationally adopting family would be waiting for a referral or court date by now; however, we have experienced many setbacks due to our involvement in the U.S. Army. At first it was Lauren's deployment that was keeping us from being able to move forward. Then we finally got the home study approved and we moved so that Matt could complete his Army training at Ft. Benning, GA. Of course, we had to then complete a home study update and resubmit it to USCIS - the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services. Now we are hastily trying to finish compiling all of the required documents for the dossier which will be sent to Ethiopia. However, we are moving again in September to Ft. Stewart, GA which will be Matt's permanent duty station. At which point, we will be having a home study update conducted once again. Two steps forward, one step back.

Adoption is not for the faint of heart - nor is it meant to be done alone. As the old saying goes, "It takes a village to raise a child". Matt is frequently gone for his Army training which means Lauren basically flies this mission solo. Speaking of which, it is tiring to try and phrase everything as "we", "Matt", and/or "Lauren", so I am just going to come out and say it: "I" am writing this blog to represent our whole family regardless of whether or not I remember to say "we". So, I am Lauren...just in case that last little bit was confusing. 8-)

Anyway, the point I was trying to get to is that I can't do this alone anymore. I frequently seek the help of my Heavenly Father, especially when we pray as a family, but I need help from my family and friends now. This process is so emotionally, physically, and financially exhausting and I have finally realized that I need to reach out to the people who love me for help and support. For those who don't know me really well, I can be a very stubborn and independent person and I'm not big on accepting help. I am going to be making updates to this blog frequently so that my family and friends know what is going on and perhaps can help me with words of encouragement, ideas for coping with stress, parenting techniques, housekeeping tips, etc.

In a few weeks Matt will begin Ranger School which means we won't see or hear from him for at least two months. We are trying really hard to get all of our documents gathered before that time so that we can submit our dossier before he leaves. I must say, I am learning how to be more self-reliant and proactive. I purchased a house the last time Matt was gone on a Field Training Exercise! Okay, back to the dossier. So, we don't have much left to gather. The first thing to do when Matt gets back from the field on Thursday will be to go get yet another police background check. We are also STILL waiting on the Army to deliver the long-awaited Letter of Employment Verification. After that, we will have three copies of each document below notarized:

Parent letter to Ethiopia
I-171H Approval from USCIS to bring an orphan into the country
State Police Clearances
Family Photo sheet
Letter of Employment Verification
2008, 2009, and 2010 Tax Returns
Adoptive Parent Form
Matt's Passport

That may look like a lot, but we have already gathered and notarized a lot of the required documents. The very last two we will have notarized will be:

Power of Attorney
Affidavit of Dossier

Once we have all of that done and we are ready to submit our dossier, we will also submit the third installment of $3000.